Spring cleaning and Change…

clutterI have always been one of those odd ball people who enjoys spring cleaning. I don’t know why. I don’t particularly enjoy cleaning in general, but there is something about the purge, of getting rid of clutter and making space for new things to come that really excites me. It’s the preparation of change, of renewal that excites me most I think. Unlike most people, I welcome change. Not that things are ever so bad, but it gives a person the chance to have a clean slate.

This year my spring cleaning has taken on a new meaning. I’m in the process of buying my first home, alone, which is daunting in and of itself. I went through a relationship change recently and my everyday life was altered more quickly than I was prepared for. You get used to living with someone, especially after 7 years, and routines become ingrained. I’ve never been one to like routines much, but for most people, it’s an occupational hazard of life.

For me it’s just one of those things that I loathe but must conform to. I have to wake at a certain hour each day and be out of the house by a set time because I have a 60 mile commute. Timeliness is something I am very conscientious about and one minor accident is all it takes to back up traffic for hours. My day job entails several tasks that must be done at certain times of the day, usually early in the morning, and of course, when I come home, I have pets that are fed routinely as well as myself and my partner. But there were days when I wished I could throw caution to the wind. Days I wished I could stop off at the bookstore instead of having to rush home to cook dinner. Days I wished I could go out with friends instead of… having to rush home to cook dinner. And now that I am alone and can do these things, it’s thrown me and it’s like I don’t know what to do with my extra time.

My first thought, of course, was to write. I would have hours to lounge about on the deck whiling away the moments as I filled page after page with new prose. That didn’t happen. The first day I had to myself was like a party and I made an extravagant dinner for myself to celebrate my freedom. Subsequent days were filled with laundry and other cleaning I was never able to get to as well as cleaning up the mess left after my partner moved out. The guest room is now filled with boxes of crap that need to be gone through and as I’ve been cleaning, I’ve been purging to prepare for my own move once the new house is acquired. And I realized as I purged how freeing it was. To not have to worry about clutter, about boxes of “things” that I hadn’t looked at in years. If I hadn’t needed it, and haven’t looked at it, it’s not important and it gets tossed. And as the space is cleared and my house is less of a reminder of what had been, my outlook changed. Slowly at first, but as I accepted my freedom and my new life and realized I wasn’t going to die or cave in being on my own, something miraculous happened… my writing came back to me. My creative muse came knocking on my door and now she won’t leave me alone, which is a wonderful thing.

I just hope that when I move, she figures out my new address.

Spring Special

For the next two months I will be offering the first book in my Lambourne Legacy series, “Earl of My Heart” as an ebook for $1.00.  In honor of Spring and to get my readers familiar with the characters in preparation for the release of my second book in this series, “Love in the Stars”

Grab your copy today and fall in love with the Lambourne’s as I have.

 Support independent publishing: Buy this e-book on Lulu.

Trust Fate….

I’d have to say I got a pretty good head start on my New Year’s resolutions this year, not that I had any.  I mean, most people do the weight loss goal and for me that has been at the top of my list for years.  My weight had ballooned in the last fifteen years, but it wasn’t caused by poor diet – not that I led a perfectly healthy, fat and cholesterol free diet life.  But I digress…

I am proud to say that after following the guidance of a sister writer who had gone through similar health issues that I had, I managed to find a doctor who listened to what I said and looked at what my body was doing and over the past three months managed to lose 75 pounds.  Wow, yes, that is a huge amount of weight, but I have twice that much to lose to get my goal and I am determined to do it.  But this post isn’t about weight loss, it’s about goals and determination and the fact that fate is fate, at least in my book.

Bad things happen to good people all the time.   People die, lose good jobs, become lost in their lives and they scream “Why?”  I won’t say that I’ve had a terrible life because I have known far too many people whose lives were much worse than mine for various reasons, but after so many years of getting the shit end of the stick, as my grandfather used to say, I have learned that there is no why. Things, good and bad, happen for a reason.  Don’t believe me? OK, think of something awful, like the death of a child.  That has to be one of the most horrendous things to happen to a person’s life.  But consider what comes after… the parent(s) connect to so many people that they hadn’t before.  Even if they keep their mourning to themselves, people crawl out of the woodwork to make their condolences known and that new connection is made.  Think of how many foundations and trusts have been started over the years because a child has died from one disease or another.

On a less severe note how about a lost love?  Yes, I’ve had a few and at times I think of them and say to myself “What a bastard he was”, but then as my mind wanders I also consider how many new friends, new places I’ve seen after them and wouldn’t have if I had stayed with them.  It happens for a reason.  I believe that.  Even the worst person in your life forced you to change in some way, admit it.  I’ve had nasty bosses that have stressed me beyond repair but I am stronger and have a stiffer spine because of it.  I’ve been beyond broke with no place to live and I survived.  I have had love and will find it again.  Everything cycles for a reason.  When you are ready for your next lesson, the universe will place it in front of you.  If you think you have already been given too many, perhaps you haven’t learned enough to move on.  Fate my friends.

And in this new year, face your fate with courage and strength and in the end, you will find yourself a better more peaceful person on the other side.